RTFC Vs Inter Me Bed

RTFC - 7 Vs Inter Me Bed - 18

The last match of the season ended up being a fine end with it's ups and downs for Romford Town, an early dip a few games in gave hope of a classic Romford Town relegation battle but with the help of certain ringers and the golden boot of one Steve Hammond the Towners almost seemed to make a last ditch attempt at promotion but finished with a fine top-half-of-the-table position and enough confidence to take into the next season.

With the present though, and we found certain Romford Town devotee's were unable to attend this final game. Unfortanate cases found Chris Jones off to watch Chelsea fat-boy Frankie Lampard miss a penalty against the irons which was result enough from a fine West Ham performance. The Crane was unable to attend through injury, DMK doing something or other, McGhee working and all this culminated into pitching a strong enough side against top-of-the-league rivals Inter Me Bed.

Tom Davey was on hand for the Towners once again this season, playing out on pitch this time as Hammond took up gloves to go in goal. Roger Dogs made another appearance along with Towner regular Murrell and getting regular Towner Stu Pac. One new face for the Towners once again as dogs drafted in a young striker going by the name of Gary to make up the numbers for the Towners.

Suffice to say, the Towners as per usual started well, seemingly holding their own against a team that had seemed to run away with it at the top of the league. Tight play from the off and the commanding presence of Tom Davey left the Towners with enough skill to take the initiative when Murrell was crowded out wide, left of the goal before he back-heeled a fine pass to Towner new-boy Gary to make the easy finish to a lovely goal on his debut.

The foreign scout for the Towners always liked to watch. Fuckin pervert.

After that, things pretty much went to shit as the Towners endured a game of flaring tempers, pikey caravan owners and yellow cards. One week after new rules were implemented into Goals it seemed that it didn't take too much for the ref to get card happy. First of all, the rough and tumble playing style of Tommy Davies landed him in trouble with the ref as he was sin-binned for repetative foul-play. Nothing really happened while Tom was off though as the Towners survived two minutes of being a player down by defending well, Benny Brace usually at the back for Romford as he denied any oncoming attackers.

It wasn't too long though before the piles of goals started mounting against Romford Town as it seemed goal-fests of 3 or 4 goals at a time peppered the Romford Town net, Hammond unable to do much about the accurate shooting boots of Inter Me Bed.

Soon enough the inevitable second half was upon us and Hammond pleaded to leave his goalmouth prison to spend the second half on pitch as Benny Brace took his place between the sticks. Free to roam in the abundance of pitch Hammond had to run into, he seemed happier as he was released into the wild. It didn't take him long to get onto the scoresheet, fighting well although it was obvious the Towners were down and out by this stage.

More goals went the Inter Me Bed way and the Towners just tried to see out the rest of the game, not really bothered by the result as they weren't going up or down a place in the league whether they won or not and even if they did, who gives a fuck? 3rd or 4th, they're the same really.

Anyways, Ben did his best in goal but was no match once again for the power and accuracy of the opposition. Roger played his part too though, using his trademark moves up and down the wings and taking out any bumbaclot that got in his way. One occasion found Rog cornered into the er corner and trying to get the tackle in and dispossess an Inter Me Bed player. Roger's physical attempt to get the ball, no different from usual, left him on the receiving end of a short Inter Me Bed temper as their player lashed out at an unsuspecting Dogs and tried to start a ruck but the card happy ref had other ideas as he sent the player on a two-minute trip to the sidelines, brandishing another yellow card.

Up the other end of the pitch the same thing happened again but involving Stu and the smallest member of the other team giving it but the Pac wasn't in no mood to rumble as he kept things cool and walked away, leaving the little shit to get disciplined by the ref.

As the game continued, most goals were scored by Tom as he let pin-point shots rip across the pitch and frustrate an otherwise able keeper. New-man Gary had some fine shots, but only when so much as to test the in-form keeper. Pac had a few opportunities to let some rip but never came away with the goal.

Who would have known that the whole team was dedicated to a geezer none of us knew existed?

Hammonds silky skills and additional goals were too little too late as the game was too far gone. The game ended and another sucessful season for the Towners was finished. What looked like 3rd place (dunno, they've fucked their site up we though there was other teams with games in hand, etc) is the final resting place for the Towners and season 2. Expect a Newsflash for news for the end of the season to be done tomorrow.

Personal Ratings

Tom Davies - A fine performance from Tom but it's a shame there wasn't a lot he could do about a complete arse-smacking from top of the league. Placed some lovely shots and it's always nice to see opposition players made to look fools with some sexual dribbling.

Steve Hammond - Not the best performance in goal I've ever seen but who gives a fuck. The boy scored the most goals last season and for that he deserves my personal thanks. Took some goals away from this one to total up an impressive run of goals for the Towners.

Gary - Sorry fella, can't remember ya 2nd name but had a good one regardless of the result. A well-taken first goal and some spirited runs for the Towners at times, just a shame there wasn't more goals taken away from the game, plenty of well-taken chances but the keeper was up to it. My personal tahnks to you for helping us out, welcome back anytime.

Stu - Improving everytime he plays for the Towners and really showed some commitment after being impeeded. Seemed to give Stu an aggressive adge which left him able to use his strength more when tackling or holding off opposition players. Good work.

Benny Brace - Was missed badly when he went in goal in the second half but an appreciated performance nonetheless in the first. Some classic Benny Brace crunching warmed up the Inter Me Bed players so they could start getting violent in the second. Nice rolling out when in goal.

Roger Dogs - Nice performance in a difficult situation but kept his head up and gave a dedicated show for the Towners. As the rest of the reds were, he was defending most of the game and when attacking never had much space to do anything but Rogers decent tackling served him well on the wings.

Murrell - One back-heel in the first half. What else did you do Murrell? Nothing! Fuck off Murrell, no-one likes ya!!!! Better score at least 2 goals in the next game or will be sacked.